Decisions

Since I was a baby I've been this bull-headed,

I just had to do it my way.

How could you ever think I got this far

By throwing it all away?

I guess words just cut deeper today,

I guess words cut deeper at my age.

It was my decision to let go of rock and roll,

Wastin' all that time seemed a shame.

Maybe I'm crazy but that's not as frightening,

As not knowing which way to go,

At least I have always thought so,

But most times I, I really don't know.

You may think that I'm goin' the wrong way,

But it's just my nature to be,

In control of the forces that drive me so recklessly,

And they're not that damned easy to see,

At least that's how it feels to me,

That's how I see it to be.

Old friends may hurt me, my lovers desert me,

And my family turn me away, I think I could take that,

It's not half as frightening, as not knowing which way to go,

At least I have always thought so,

But most times I really don't know,

Most times I really don't know.

I wrote this song not long after I resigned from Erik The Red in 1980.

I never did get a handle on the forces that drive me.

And I’m still not certain which way to go.